A Poem for Ben Almost 35 years ago I walked through your back door, The smell of crispy bacon hanging in the air. This is Tina, Brendan said, and that was that, Our very first meeting, you in your Benny hat. Sit down you two, the dinner’s ready, Do you want Murphys was all you said. ‘Pardon me’ I replied, several times, Before just Brendan nodded his head. Upon my plate, the bacon sat, Black pudding burnt and bitter. A sausage buried underneath fried mushrooms, The slippery little critters. To this day we have a joke about those mysterious Murphys, Who'd have thought the plain old spud would cause such confusion. His reaction was simple, when I said 'yes'. Do you not understand plain English! After two years dating Brendan, Ben saved me from my fate. He opened up his house to me, His heart, his home his grate. Oh how, I loved that Park-ray, On a cold and frosty morning. Emptying those ashes, Getting that fire roaring. Ice upon the Windows, On the outside and the in. It really didn't do the job, But an extra thick duvet did. We settled into a routine, And your house began to sparkle. Flowers arrived in the living room, A doily on the table. Evenings of chatting, catching up, Watching the old TV. The pools man calling at 6pm, Time for a cup of tea. Up for a bath on a Saturday evening, You'd soak away for hours. Shaved and scrubbed for another week, A pint or eight at the Club beckoned. I'd often hear your late return, From the little bedroom window. Your Sabir van revving! As you parked crooked on the curb. The hangover in the morning, Would never stay for long. Unless you'd had a skinful, And we wouldn't see you until one. Now on that note of driving, Whilst under the influence of drink. I can't believe you were never caught, And thrown in to the clink. One year later we moved out, And marriages there were a plenty. Not one, not two, not three but four, To keep the wolf at your door. Dave and Sarah already married, Started of the grand kid fashion. Years went by and more were added, Twelve in total, then four great grand kids. Get togethers could get quite busy, Full of laughter, jokes and water! False teeth seemed to feature often, Floating around in a cup, glass or saucer. Our house was extended with your help, But we had complaints from our neighbour. You taught her many new words, She'd never heard before. The years sped by and we moved house, From Braintree to Great Notley. Every time you dropped by we'd hear the words, 'How bloody lovely'. Every project, we couldn't start, Without your intervention. The driveway and decking, then finally the big extension. You helped every one of us, With hammer, saw and chisel. A door here, a fire place there, A shed or two with time to spare. The little and the big things, It didn't matter which. You did them all uniquely, From all your odd old bits. Not a penny would you waste, If you really didn't have to. The ultimate re-user and recycler, The kids could learn from you. On your way home from working at Troy's, You'd drop in and have a moan, I've lost another wing mirror! Time to stop driving became inevitable. So on the bus you started to travel, And mostly arrived at your destination. A couple of times you worried us greatly, Once in Wales and once in Braintree. The police were called by a worried Brendan, Swansea, not Llanelli was you station. Tired and thirsty you finally turned up, On Una's doorstep, Oh what fun! In the last few years you used your scooter, Up to the town and back again. How on earth you got there safely, Still dumbfounds us nearly daily. The last few months were the hardest ever, But did you give up, never. I loved the way you just kept fighting, Continued smiling, you entertainer. Now you're gone we have all the memories, The sad times, hard times but especially the fun times. We will always remember you, From your devoted daughter-in-law Tina